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  Submission and Obedience 


Here at ReCovering we are all about practicality, what works and what does not.  We have found that when an individual interprets the scriptures within the context of God's character, attributes and traits, in addition to having the faith to believe what His word says, it leaves little room for error. 

The bible is clear, God is love and those who claim to be followers of His Son and claim to be lead by His Holy Spirit are to pass that love to others who they are in authority over and who they are responsible to God for.  God created the authority stucture to protect, provide for, nurture, grow and encourage those who are under authority. For those of us who are under authority we are to submit to and obey the love of God flowing from a husband and father or spiritual leader.  It's as simple as that. The authority should feel great satisfaction in doing this and those under the authority should feel safe and protected so they are able to function and thrive in the calling they have.  The Lord does instruct us differently concerning worldly authority but in this case we are speaking of the homes of those who call themselves believers in Yeshua/Jesus. Biblical authority is best seen in a healthy husband and wife in raising their children.  There is satisfaction, joy and contentment. A feeling and safety and security for the wife who can then pass that onto her children. 

 A wife who needs to "submit" to her husbands unhealthy mindsets, misbehaviors, and criticisms will not be able to function well. This is not "bearing her cross" this is submitting to abuse. This takes tremendous energy away from her tasks of keeping a home and raising children and excelling in her giftings from God. Proverbs 31 explains in detail a wife whose husband is trusting and trustworthy, a husband who covers his wife with respect and love and in turn reaps the benefits of that covering of trust.   He has a wife who is talented and has the energy and joy for the lifetime of tasks that God has entrusted her with.

If love is not present in a husband.  If there is chronic agreement with things that oppose God and break down others, we have found that believing and acting on what the bible says works.  Those under an authority are to confront unhealthy mindsets and misbehaviors of the authority figure in the love of God flowing from them.  With the hope that perhaps the authority will consider, humble themselves and turn from the unhealthy patterns and mindsets. (Naman and his servant, Ester and the King, David and Saul, Abigail and David, Matt. 18).  There is no place in scripture that says those under authority can not approach those in authority with a request for change or at the very least to express what is ok and what is not ok for them, what they have a peace about participating with and what they do not.  Hopefully, if needed, this can all be done with the support of another elder believer and if that doesn't work with the support of the elders of a church. 

Unfortunately again, the body of Messiah is in such a state of weakness, these last two options are usually not an option and more often than not it leaves women and children exposed, uncovered and unprotected in their own home and community.  Wives are encouraged to "be quiet to win him without a word", "to not withhold", to agree to things contrary to their values to keep the peace.  What results is either a "wired" woman full of anxiety or excitement due to being sure there is something wrong with her as she desperately searches for the illusive fix to her marriage or it results in a "tired" woman who is anxious and depressed and beat-down, who lives life in a fog, with empty, dull eyes.  Both of these women just try to make it through each day under the oppression of an uncovered home.  Both result in a weakened and soon broken person, who may be chronically depressed, anxious, over-excited, and/or angry.

A home and family was created by God to be the safest place.  A greenhouse to grow and flourish.

We define love by 1 Corinthians 13:1-13

We believe an authority's only calling and purpose given by God is to build up and not tear down.

2 Corinthians 10:8 and 2 Corinthians 13:10

We believe God has given every believer access to love, power and a sound mind and authority espcially is given wisdom to use this in a correct and healthy way that edifies family.  This access to love, power and a sound mind is cut off when living contrary to God in some way or submitting to a lie or lies of the enemy. A husband's prayers are then hindered by not being able to hear God and his direction. As a helpmeet a wife's call is to remind her husband of his God and his God's ways, not in a nagging way but living it and letting her husband know what she can and can not participate with.  It is not holy to enable sin or unhealthy mindsets in another believers life when it directly affects yours.  We are called to sharpen each other not beat each other with our dull swords. 

Since most women never imagined they would be in this position and that the man who confessed to love her and her only until death parted them it often takes some counsel and coaching to know how to begin how to do confront in a loving and effective way.  A woman wasn't created to "protect herself and her children" but when circumstances require it, God has made a way by strengthening herself in Him and standing for His truth in the strength of righteousness and virtue. 

We believe it's only worldly authority that seeks to rule it's household through demanded obedience and submission without searching it's own heart.  (the King and Vashti).  Genesis 3:16 One curse and consequence of the fall was man would rule over his wife and family.    His wife would desire a relationship with her husband but his natural bent would be to rule over her.  God's way of relationship now had to be chosen by a man and would have to be a daily choice and would not come naturally or easily at first.  Unfortunately this curse, consequence, and worldly mindset has in turn, made it's way into the church and family and has created atmospheres of silencing, pressured submission and obedience under the risk of anger, threat, "being tempted", and other misbehaviors.  To "rule" by means of insisting on obedience under unloving authority is destructive, it's not God's way, and we have yet to see it have a healthy, workable outcome even one time.  

When a man and woman come for counsel and coaching this is our position and it has had good fruit for those who are humble, willing, and hopeful for change. Life is so short.  Thriving relationship is were the most valuable memories in life are found and also what we will stand before God and give an account for.  Marriage was created to be God's brightest light to the world.  There is a path to peace, contentment and joy, but it must be done God's way. 

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